Clara sat on the edge of the bed, staring at her phone screen, which displayed a photo of Alfred with Cecilia. The two of them looked close and perfectly in sync. The throbbing pain in Clara’s heart grew more intense.
She had once refused to be selfish and wanted Alfred to reclaim the lost part of himself, but now she was the one feeling afraid. She was afraid of losing Alfred forever.
A profound dilemma surrounded Clara. She wondered if, had she not filed for divorce and pushed Alfred away, the man would have stayed faithfully by her side. But she also wondered whether, if she had not done it then, she could have lived with the guilt for the rest of her life.
Thoughts spun through her head. This and that. Clara felt as though her head were about to explode. Unable to bear it any longer, she finally hurled her phone onto the bed, then screamed loudly as she clutched her hair.
Her breathing came fast. Her head hung low. Her beautiful face was hidden behind her long, lovely hair.
Then she stood, approached the nightstand beside the bed, and opened the second drawer. She took out a white bottle, then sank down onto the floor.
Clara stared at the bottle and murmured, “In the end, I have to depend on you again.”
She opened the bottle, poured out two small pills, and swallowed them with the water already waiting on the nightstand. She set the glass and bottle down carelessly.
Clara drew up both legs and hugged them tightly. Her gaze went blank before she collapsed onto her side, curled up like a poor little kitten. Tears trickled down her cheeks.
Memories of her past echoed in her mind, making Clara squeeze her eyes shut. Yet at that very moment, her tears began to flow even more freely.
Clara had grown up in a prominent, deeply harmonious family. Her parents loved and respected each other. They did not merely love each other as ordinary couples did; they gave to each other as well. Their relationship was beautifully reciprocal.
There had been very little conflict in Clara’s family, much like in her marriage to Alfred. Her parents were always smiling. They never raised their voices when they were angry.
Clara had been happy watching them. She had felt deeply loved.
But one day, just after she returned home from high school, her father suddenly pulled a suitcase out of the bedroom. Her mother followed, doing the same.
They looked at each other and said in unison, “I’m sick of you.”
“Cedric, we should just get divorced. I can’t live with you anymore. I’m under so much pressure. I don’t have a life of my own. I’m bored, and I’m sick of everything,” said Jasmine Helena, Clara’s mother.
Cedric Gideon glared sharply and retorted, “I never told you to do any of that. You were the one who took the initiative. Whatever consequences come from it, you can bear them yourself.”
“Cedric! You’re so selfish!” Jasmine screamed. “I hate you.”
She then pulled her suitcase along and stopped in front of the stunned Clara. “Clara, forgive me. Go with your father. I need to find myself again. I need time to put everything back together.”
Before Clara could answer, the woman in the red brocade dress walked away. Cedric immediately shouted after her, but Jasmine paid him no attention at all.
“Damn that woman!” Cedric raged.
Then he looked at Clara and said, “Stay in this house. You’ll be safe with the maid and bodyguard. I have to leave too.”
Once again, without waiting for an answer, Clara was abandoned without hesitation for the second time.
Tears welled in Clara’s eyes. She gripped the side of her skirt tightly, trying to process everything.
When Cedric reached the front porch, Clara finally came to her senses. She immediately ran outside. “Dad! Dad, no! Don’t leave me all alone!”