The first morning without Arman felt quieter than usual. Rania woke on the side of the bed that still held traces of her husband's presence, then stared at the empty space beside her for a long while. For a moment, she still hoped Arman would open his eyes and ask why she was looking at him like that, but reality soon reminded her that it would never happen again.
Rania took a deep breath, then got out of bed.
In the kitchen, she prepared some warm water and something to eat. Her hands still felt weak, and her eyes were swollen from crying nearly all night. But when she saw how little food there was on the table, Rania suddenly remembered that from now on, she had to be more careful with every dollar she had.
She opened Arman's wallet, which she had brought home from the hospital the day before.
There wasn't much inside.
Rania counted the money slowly, then stared at the few bills left in her hand. Before the accident, that amount might have been enough for a few household necessities, but without Arman's income, it wouldn't last long.
Rania closed her eyes for a moment.
She couldn't panic.
Not yet.
She still had a home to live in, even if it was modest. There were still some groceries in the kitchen, and most importantly, there was still a little life depending on her.
Her hand slowly moved to her stomach.
“Good morning, sweetheart.”
Rania offered a faint smile.
“From now on, it's just Mom and you.”
Her smile slowly faded, but her hand remained there. She couldn't feel her baby's movements yet, but knowing that her child was still growing inside her made Rania feel a little stronger.
After a simple breakfast, Rania began tidying the house.
The chores she had usually done with Arman now had to be done alone. She washed the dishes, swept the floor, folded the laundry, then stopped for a long moment when she found Arman's shirt still hanging behind the door.
Rania touched the fabric.
Her husband's scent had almost faded away.
But her memories of Arman were still painfully clear.
“Why did you have to leave so soon?”
Her voice was barely audible.
Rania hugged the shirt for a moment before finally putting it back. She knew that if she kept going like this, she would never be able to move forward.
And she couldn't stop.
Not now.
Not when her child still needed her.
That afternoon, Ms. Sari came by with some food.
“Rania, eat something first,” she said, setting the container on the table.
Rania gave her a small smile. “Thank you, Ms. Sari.”
“Try not to think too much right now. You're pregnant.”
Rania nodded.
But Ms. Sari knew Rania was thinking about something. The woman's gaze had never truly been calm since morning.
“What are you thinking about?”
Rania fell silent.
“Work.”
Ms. Sari frowned. “Work?”
Rania nodded.
“I have to start looking for a job.”
“Now?”
“I can't just sit around at home, Ms. Sari.”
Ms. Sari looked at Rania's stomach.
“You're pregnant.”
“I know.”
“And you just lost your husband.”
“I know that too.”
Rania lowered her head.
“But I don't know how long the money I have will last.”
Ms. Sari couldn't argue with that.
Rania wasn't thinking only of herself. She was thinking about the child who hadn't even been born yet.
“I have to prepare everything before the baby is born.”
“Then don't push yourself too hard.”
Rania smiled.
“I'll be careful.”
After Ms. Sari left, Rania sat alone in the living room. She took a small notebook that belonged to Arman and that he usually used to record the household expenses.
Its pages were filled with numbers.
Rania began to calculate.
Food.
Electricity.
Water.
Baby necessities.
Prenatal checkups.
She had to account for everything.
As the total grew larger, Rania fell silent.
For the first time, she truly realized how difficult the life ahead of her would be.
In the past, whenever something fell short, she could ask Arman for help.
Now there was no one.
Rania closed the notebook.
Tears filled her eyes again.
But she wouldn't let them fall.
She stood and walked toward the bedroom.
Their wedding photo was still on the table.
Rania picked it up.
“Arman.”
Her finger touched her husband's face in the photo.
“I'm scared.”
For the first time, she admitted that fear out loud.
“I'm really scared.”
Rania held the photo against her chest.
“I don't know how to raise our child without you.”
A few seconds later, she wiped her own tears away.
“But I'll learn.”
Rania looked at the photo through tear-filled eyes.
“I'll do whatever I can.”
She then placed the photo back on the table and sat on the edge of the bed.
Her hand returned to her stomach.
“Listen, sweetheart.”
Her voice was gentle.
“Mom may not have much money.”
She took a breath.
“Mom may not be able to give you everything other children have.”
Her eyes began to fill with tears.
“But I promise you won't be alone.”
Rania smiled through her tears.
“Mom will protect you.”
The words were simple.
But to Rania, they were a promise she had to keep for the rest of her life.
The next day, Rania began looking for work.
She visited several places that might need extra help. Some turned her down because she was pregnant, while others said the work was too demanding for a woman in her condition.
Every rejection made her steps feel heavier.
But Rania kept trying.
At last, the owner of a small food stall offered her a job helping clean the place and prepare a few simple things.
The pay wasn't much.
But to Rania, it was enough to be a start.
Her first day of work was exhausting.
She came home when the sun was nearly setting. Her feet ached and her back hurt, but when she opened the door, Rania immediately saw Arman's photo still in its place.
She gave a small smile.
“I found a job.”
For some reason, Rania felt as though she were telling Arman about it.
“It isn't much, but I'll try my best.”
She then sat in a chair and held her stomach.
“Our child will be all right.”
Rania gazed out the window.
The evening sky slowly darkened.
Her life truly wasn't the same anymore.
Her husband was gone.
The future they had once planned together had changed.
But there was still one little life that gave Rania a reason to keep standing.
And that night, before going to sleep, Rania repeated the same promise.
“No matter what happens, Mom will protect you.”
She gently stroked her stomach.
“So you don't have to be afraid.”
Rania closed her eyes.
For the first time since Arman was gone, she tried to sleep without crying.
Tomorrow would be a harder day.
But Rania had already chosen to face it.