Today looked busier than usual, not because of any particular event or activity.
Rather, today's customers were all dads of various ages.
"Ugh... I don't like today's topic."
I muttered under my breath while putting on a fake smile for them—the dad customers.
Most of them came from the lower economic class, getting stepped on and somehow becoming addicted to it. Such a bizarre fetish. And whenever they ran out of ideas, they would inevitably direct their domestic frustrations toward me.
"Hahaha..."
One of the bespectacled groups laughed, then gradually turned toward their next subject of discussion.
Whatever was going on, they seemed so happy.
As far as I was concerned, hoping they wouldn't discuss me like they usually did was more than enough.
"We'll have our usual."
Mr. Riyadin called out to me.
"Okay..."
I knew the regulars well enough that I was used to each person's preferred drink and proportions.
Mr. Moedji always had his coffee without sugar.
Mr. Riyadin always ordered ginger tea.
And the rest wanted black coffee with a medium amount of sugar.
For the first hour after watching anime, there was no sign that they were looking for a subject to discuss.
Right before starting the next episode, Mr. Moedji called me.
"Yo, Riyumi!"
Damn, here we go again.
Whether I liked it or not, I had to keep acting friendly.
"Everyone looks pretty happy today."
I replied, trying to remain friendly toward them.
"Oh, I forgot..." Mr. Moedji thought for a moment. "How old are you now?"
"About twenty-three, for now."
"Whoa, only two years left!"
Mr. Riyadin chimed in.
"Two years until what?"
"Marriage."
At last, the topic I found most annoying had arrived.
"Is that really mandatory?"
"But it's nice, you know?"
Nice?
"Is it?"
"Of course. Someone cooks for you, someone does the laundry, and you don't have to sleep alone."
Mr. Riyadin answered with great enthusiasm.
Following the lessons in perspective that Adhi had once given me, I had to look at problems from another angle. Even if it ended up hurting a lot, not taking things too seriously would save me from unnecessary emotions.
"So what kind of criteria are you looking for?"
"Mr. Riyadin, I'm not looking for anything weird or complicated." I glanced at all of them. "As long as she's still alive."
"So someone who's seventy would work?"
Mr. Paijo, who had been happily drinking, immediately sprayed some of his drink and choked on it.
Everyone burst out laughing, just as Adhi had advised me.
"Okay, don't take it that far, sir."
Sure enough, the conversation now circled around their respective family situations.
But Mr. Moedji still seemed unsatisfied with my cheap joke.
"But seriously, kid, you should get married soon."
Kid?
Why was he suddenly calling me that?
For some reason, I began shivering from my waist all the way to the top of my head.
"Do I really have to?"
I asked, trying to find out what he really meant.
"Of course. So the one down there won't have to serve only one purpose."
I gave no response beyond a fake smile, because I had standards of my own when it came to life.
Besides, that wasn't the answer. The dads' dirty jokes directed at me were nothing more than jokes.
"So when are you getting married?"
Mr. Riyadin asked persuasively.
"I don't know, sir."
"Hey, what about my daughter?"
I was fairly shocked. That was a direct offer from a father.
"Seriously, Ji?!"
Mr. Paijo exclaimed in disbelief.
"What's wrong with that?"
"Sorry, sir, but isn't that going a little too far?"
"See? Even Ruyimin gets it."
Riyumi, huh...
Mr. Paijo always intentionally mispronounced my name.
"It's not a problem, right?"
I had better fix the mindset of this man drunk on coffee grounds!
"Sir..." I said to Mr. Moedji. "Your daughter Putri is very sweet and capable."
Mr. Moedji was flattered by my words. For some reason, I felt sorry for his wife.
His smile was pretty strange to me.
"And as a sane man, I certainly wouldn't pass up an opportunity like this."
"Hehehe."
Mr. Moedji was falling deeper and deeper under the spell of my illusionary eloquence.
The others began to realize what was happening and chose to remain silent.
"It would be an honor to marry your daughter."
"So that's settled, right?"
"There is one thing standing in my way, sir."
Mr. Moedji thought for a moment, looking for a solution while trying to guess what was on my mind.
"Don't worry about it. I'll cover everything!"
"Cover what?"
Everyone looked listless and grew even more curious about Mr. Moedji's response to my plan.
"The wedding money, right?"
"Well... that's actually one of the things."
"Don't worry..." He puffed out his chest. "I'll take care of it!"
Whoa, this had gone too far. A wink from one of the others made me realize it was time to bring Mr. Moedji back to his senses.
Should I just say it?
Yeah, let's just say it!
"Actually, there's something else."
"Something else?" Mr. Moedji replied, beginning to sound doubtful. "Fine, go ahead."
"Isn't your daughter Putri only six years old?"
Everyone began laughing softly, along with several other customers.
"Well, just put her on preorder."
Oh, come on. This guy's train of thought was getting more off-road by the second.
"That'll take too long, sir. Riyumi will be an old lady by then."
Ouch, Mr. Riyadin could be sharp.
"Why not make it an ancient artifact while you're at it?"
Mr. Paijo added after taking a sip of his ginger tea.
After I joined the dads' conversation as it spiraled out of control, a regular customer who always came in ready to shake up my perspective arrived.