Trust given so freely should still be cared for and protected.
Six
Zio asked me to start working that very day. I said I couldn't. His eyebrows immediately drooped, and his lips puckered into a pout. Hey, he really was right about looking young. He looked like a high schooler sulking because he wasn't getting his way.
“I have to deal with moving,” I said. I noticed that Zio had finished his food and drink. He'd eaten mechanically, without really enjoying any of it.
“Do you even have that much stuff?” Zio raised one eyebrow.
Uh. Well. Not really, actually. I didn't have many personal belongings. Maybe a few notebooks, books about tourism and Bali and the surrounding areas, and one box full of photos. I remembered everything in my wardrobe: one backpack with a busted zipper that was still usable anyway. A few secondhand school uniforms whose seams were starting to unravel. One shoulder bag, two dresses suitable for going to the mall or college, one pair of jeans, two pairs of trousers, a house dress, two beach wraps, one skirt, two shirts, and three casual T-shirts. And, of course, one batik cloth inherited from my mother and a brocade kebaya that was too tight. Half a dozen bras and pairs of underwear that were starting to wear out—it was time to buy new ones. I only had one pair of beat-up flip-flops and one pair of worn-out sneakers. Ugh.
“I also have to take care of various things.”
“What various things?”
I fidgeted restlessly. Maybe Zio didn't realize it, but he wore clothes that had clearly been custom-tailored for him. He probably wouldn't understand the dilemma I was facing. Right now, I was wearing blue jeans that were almost white—so faded from being washed so often—a casual T-shirt, and an unbuttoned shirt. Actually, the T-shirt had been handed down from my big brother.
If I was going to work as Diva's caregiver, I needed more presentable clothes, right? Some kind of uniform. Something that showed professionalism.
“Uh…” I swallowed. I knew this might be too much, but I had no other choice. “Could I borrow some money first? The various things mean… I need to buy a babysitter's uniform.”
“You don't need one. Just wear something comfortable for you.”
“I… haven't paid my rent for two months.”
“Hmm.”
“I also need a kebaya and slippers for my graduation ceremony. And my school farewell party will cost money too.” My voice grew quieter. Diva must have noticed my mood changing, because she stopped playing and looked at me. She stared at me in silence. Oh God, that was terrifying. It was like she was looking straight into my soul and could see everything I was hiding.
“What else do you need?”
His tone was casual, as if he was simply curious. There wasn't any judgment in it, thankfully.
“I'll just say it straight, Zio. I'm p-o-o-r.” I spelled it out so Diva wouldn't understand what it meant. Did little kids know what poor meant? If I was going to take care of her, I'd find out soon enough. “I promise I'll work as hard as I can, but I told you from the beginning that I don't have any experience. I might make mistakes. Maybe asking a stranger like you for a loan is a mistake too.” Shut up, Stella. Right now.
Zio tapped his fingers against the table while nodding. “Will all your stuff from the boarding house fit in a car?”
“Depends on the car, I guess?”
Zio named the type of car. I swallowed. As a local tour guide, I was naturally familiar with some of the car brands guests could rent. That was the kind of car usually rented by high-budget guests. “Yeah, I think it'll fit,” I said.
“Then what are you waiting for? Let's go to your boarding house, pay all your bills, and move you into my house.”
All I could do was gape at him. “Right now?”
“The sooner, the better.” Zio paid, then quickly dragged us out of there.
I assumed Zio had a driver, but this time he drove his own car. “That's usually how it is,” he commented when I asked. “But today Diva wanted to go somewhere with just me.”
Diva sat in a car seat that looked safe and comfortable in the back seat. I was in front beside Zio, and I already regretted it before we'd even gone anywhere. I felt awkward, even though Zio didn't seem to notice at all.
It didn't take long for us to arrive in front of the alley where my boarding house was. “Need help packing?” Zio asked. I shook my head. He opened his wallet and handed me a thick wad of hundred-thousand-rupiah bills without counting them. “If it's not enough, just let me know.”
Agh. I almost choked. I was about to count the money first—I didn't want to be accused of embezzling money before I'd even started—but Zio waved me away with his hand. Fine. I stuffed the money into my shabby shoulder bag, then hurried out of the car.
It crossed my mind that Zio trusted people far too easily. I could have conned him. That realization made me like Zio a little more. He'd hired me, a nobody. He was putting his trust in me. I hoped I wouldn't disappoint him.