That night, in a dimly lit room, a girl walked over to the window and opened it. Cold air immediately seeped into her body. Cold? Of course. But that feeling had become her faithful companion every night. She sat on the windowsill and fell silent.
Her gaze remained fixed on the sky, which was putting on a breathtaking display. Stars were scattered across it, and the moon looked perfect. Maybe this would be the most beautiful night of her life. Usually, there was only the moon by itself, or nothing at all—just darkness. Just like her.
But tonight was different. Six stars seemed reluctant to stray far from the moon. They reminded her of something … or rather, someone.
“Starlight? Starya?” she whispered.
She reached for her phone and played the playlist of favorite songs that always kept her company at times like this. Songs with profound meaning, as if they knew her intimately. Every note sent memories of the past spinning through her mind like a broken cassette tape.
Her life, you could say, was far from okay. The person she was now was nothing like the person she used to be. The beautiful smile she once had had faded. Her body had grown thin, and her face was covered in acne. People often said she didn’t know how to take care of herself. Even her own family frequently called her sickly.
Ironically, the place that was supposed to be home had become her deepest wound.
She let out a hollow laugh. She knew her family only showed up when they needed money. They demanded that she work hard to repay every expense they had paid while raising her. If she had a choice, she would have preferred never to be born. Her greatest regret was coming home after living away from home for so long.
The only “home” that had never hurt her was Starlight—the boy band that always cheered her up, anytime and anywhere. They were her inspiration. Her reason to keep going. She knew Starlight didn’t know her. But through Starya—their fandom—she knew that love was real.
She had supported them for five years. She had witnessed all their struggles. The good times and the bad, the rises and the falls. She was there. Year after year, it became harder to see them together. They were separated more often because of their solo schedules. But the most devastating moment had come two years ago—when Binero died from a mysterious illness.
If only she, or anyone, had been there. Maybe Binero could still have been saved. But it was already too late.
That wound never healed. Even now, she still couldn’t accept that Binero was gone. She often thought that perhaps Starlight’s condition was even more shattered than her own.
This year, there was a small glimmer of relief. Though they were no longer complete, they had come together again after a two-year hiatus. In fact, they had held a concert two weeks ago. Sadly, she couldn’t attend. Money and distance stood in her way. But she was still happy, even if she could only watch through a screen.
Suddenly, her phone vibrated. There was a new notification about Starlight.
She opened it at once, full of hope, wanting to hear more good news. But her breath caught when she read the headline: Wooan would enlist for mandatory military service next month.
She drew a heavy breath. It was okay; all she could do was pray for the best. But the next article cut even deeper: Jinren couldn’t enlist because of health problems.
An autoimmune disease.
Her sobs broke free. Why did hardship keep coming one blow after another? For her, and for them. Binero’s image came rushing back. The old wound split open again.
She lowered her head. Her tears became impossible to stop.
Bang! Bang!
Someone pounded hard on her bedroom door. She kept crying, not caring. Even though the pounding made her chest tremble.
“Open up! What’s taking you so long?” her mother’s voice echoed.
A few moments later, the bedroom door was opened with a spare key. Her mother stood there with her hands on her hips, staring at her daughter as she cried, curled up on the windowsill. There wasn’t a trace of concern on her face. Only curses.
“All you know how to do is cry, huh?”
She looked at her mother. Suddenly, her head felt heavy. Her vision blurred. Her body grew weak and unsteady. She didn’t even realize when she lost her balance and fell from the window.
The last thing she managed to do was smile at her mother.
In her final moments, her eyes were still fixed on the sky. The moon. Those stars. They were still there. Keeping her company. A faint smile graced her face.
Maybe this is the end of my life ….
“I, Ramiela Shinsen … am so grateful that I ever got to know you, Starlight.”
Thud.
Her body struck the ground. Blood flowed from her head. But the smile remained. Even at the end of her life, no one came to help her. But it was okay. She accepted it.
She wanted only one thing: for Starlight to be happy.
Let’s meet again ... in the next life.
Her eyes slowly closed.