It rained.
Gangyeon drank a vanilla latte while looking out the café window. Same seat, same time, for a whole week. By now, the café worker recognized Gangyeon's face. They even asked first, “Vanilla latte again today?” Gangyeon nodded and thought to himself.
‘I got recognized by the café worker first.’
I was still nowhere near that with Yeonwoo.
6:20 p.m. The café door opened. It was Yeonwoo. Today was different. She wasn't wearing earbuds. Her hair was wet. It looked like she didn't have an umbrella. Yeonwoo swept her hair back once with her hand and went to the counter.
Gangyeon's heart sank at the sight of Yeonwoo's wet hair. When she was a woman, she would've pulled out a towel. She always carried a small towel in her handbag, just in case Yeonwoo got caught in the rain. Yeonwoo didn't know that, though.
Yeonwoo picked up her Americano and looked for a seat. She sat across from Gangyeon again today. Maybe sitting in the same spot for a week had become a habit, or maybe there simply weren't any other seats. Gangyeon decided to go with the latter. If it was the former, her expectations would get too high.
“It’s raining pretty hard.”
Gangyeon spoke naturally. After talking to Yeonwoo every day for a week, her first words no longer trembled as much.
Yeonwoo looked up. Her eyes showed through her wet bangs. She looked at Gangyeon. This time, there was an expression on her face. Annoyance. But she wasn't annoyed with Gangyeon. She looked annoyed at the rain.
“I didn’t bring an umbrella.”
Yeonwoo said it to Gangyeon. First.
Gangyeon screamed internally.
“I have an umbrella. Want to borrow it when you leave later?”
Yeonwoo looked at Gangyeon. Three seconds. Five seconds.
“It’s okay. Looks like it’ll stop soon.”
It was a refusal. But it was different from yesterday's refusal. This wasn't a wall like “Look it up on Naver.” She was saying no because she genuinely thought the rain would stop soon. Gangyeon felt the difference.
“Just in case, I’ll leave it here. If you don’t use it, you can leave it at the counter.”
Yeonwoo looked at Gangyeon. This time, for a little longer. Her eyes were weighing something. Trying to figure out why this man was acting this way.
“…You’re a strange person.”
“I hear that a lot.”
Gangyeon smiled. The corners of Yeonwoo's lips lifted ever so slightly. Gangyeon didn't miss it.
The rain didn't stop. If anything, it got heavier.
Yeonwoo finished her Americano and looked out the window. She furrowed her brow. Gangyeon pretended not to notice and kept looking at her laptop.
Yeonwoo stood up. She slung her bag over her shoulder and walked toward the door. She passed by the umbrella Gangyeon had left there. She didn't stop.
‘She’s not taking it.’
Gangyeon was a little disappointed. But there was nothing she could do. Taking an umbrella from a man she barely knew wasn't like Yeonwoo.
Yeonwoo opened the café door. The sound of the rain suddenly grew louder. Just as she was about to step outside, she stopped.
She turned around.
Her eyes met Gangyeon's.
Yeonwoo came back. She picked up the umbrella.
“I’ll borrow it.”
Then she left. Gangyeon stared blankly at the café door as it closed. Through the glass, she saw the black umbrella open. Yeonwoo's small back disappeared beneath it.
Gangyeon took a sip of her vanilla latte. It was sweet. Sweeter than usual today.
Gangyeon left the café. The rain was still coming down. Since she had lent out her umbrella, naturally, Gangyeon didn't have one. A six-foot-three man walked through the rain. But she felt good. The rain was cold, but she felt good.
As she turned into an alley, someone was standing in front of the café. A man. He was tall and lean, wearing a leather jacket. He was smoking. Gangyeon was about to walk past him, but stopped.
The man had been standing beside Yeonwoo.
No—he had been waiting for Yeonwoo. Maybe he'd seen her come out of the café, because he tossed his cigarette aside and walked toward her. Yeonwoo stood beneath an umbrella. Gangyeon's umbrella.
“Hey, why didn’t you answer your phone?”
The man spoke casually. He was speaking casually to Yeonwoo.
‘Jin Woobin.’
Gangyeon's body went rigid. When she was a woman, she'd only seen his face in pictures. This was her first time seeing him in person. He was handsome, sure. But she didn't like his eyes. They were somehow unfocused. The kind of eyes people got from drinking too much.
“My battery died.”
Her voice was cold. Completely different from how she spoke to me. With me, her indifference was comfortable. With Jin Woobin, it was the indifference of someone who genuinely didn't care.
“Let’s get something to eat. I’m hungry.”
“I was about to go home.”
“Come on, eat with me. It’s been days since we’ve seen each other.”
Jin Woobin grabbed Yeonwoo's arm. Gangyeon's fist clenched.
Yeonwoo didn't pull away. Or rather, it seemed less like she chose not to and more like she couldn't be bothered. Her expression said it all. She looked annoyed by the entire situation.
“…Fine.”
Yeonwoo started walking. Jin Woobin fell into step beside her. Only Yeonwoo was under the umbrella. Jin Woobin was getting rained on, but he didn't seem to care.
Gangyeon stood in the rain and watched their backs recede. The black umbrella in Yeonwoo's hand. The umbrella Gangyeon had lent her. Yeonwoo beneath it, with Jin Woobin beside her.
Her chest hurt. It had hurt when she was a woman, too, but seeing it in this body hurt differently. Before, it had been, ‘It’s too bad Yeonwoo is dating a guy like that.’ But now there was something else mixed in. An emotion she didn't want to put a name to.
Gangyeon turned away. She walked in the opposite direction through the rain.
When she got home, she took a shower. Hot water streamed over her broad shoulders. She saw the man's face reflected in the mirror. His eyes were red and bloodshot. Whether it was from the rain or something else, she didn't know.
Her phone rang. It was KakaoTalk.
Yeonwoo: Dohwa Yeonwoo: I ran into Woobin today Yeonwoo: And he asked me to drink with him again Yeonwoo: I’m seriously exhausted
Gangyeon looked at her phone while drying her wet hair with a towel. Her fingers trembled.
Dohwa: Just break up with him Dohwa: You’re always saying you’re tired because of him
She regretted it as soon as she sent the messages. Dohwa wasn't normally this direct. She was always the one who listened and said, “Really? That must’ve been hard.” But today, she couldn't hold it in.
Yeonwoo: LOL why are you suddenly like this Yeonwoo: He’s always been like that Dohwa: Then you should break up with him even more Yeonwoo: Hey, what’s wrong with you today? Did something happen?
Gangyeon set down her phone and looked at the ceiling.
‘Did something happen?’
It did. I saw you walking with your boyfriend under the umbrella I gave you. But I can't tell you that. I wasn't there. Not as Dohwa.
She picked up her phone again.
Dohwa: No, I’m just worried about you Dohwa: Sorry, maybe I was being a little sensitive Yeonwoo: It’s okay Yeonwoo: So, when are you going to let me see you? Yeonwoo: It’s been so long I’m going to forget what you look like, Baek Dohwa Yeonwoo: Don’t tell me you’re going to say soon again and brush me off Dohwa: Sorry Yeonwoo: I’ll let it slide because it’s you. When we meet, I’m going to ask exactly how busy you’ve been. Dohwa: Okay, I’ll tell you everything when we meet. See you next time
Gangyeon set down her phone and pulled up the blankets.
Even lying diagonally, her feet stuck out today. She needed to buy a new blanket. One that fit this body.
The sound of rain tapped against the window. Since Yeonwoo had taken the umbrella, Gangyeon could get it back at the café tomorrow. Yeonwoo would come return it. Probably.?
‘…She’ll come, right?’
She wasn't sure. But she was hopeful. Having hope was still better than where she'd been a week ago.
Gangyeon closed her eyes. Listening to the rain, she fell asleep.