“How dare you, Binar.”
Murni looked absolutely furious after hearing Binar bring up her marriage to Bimo.
“Just so you know, Bimo is better in every way than that father of yours. Your father was a cheating, abusive man with no empathy. If I could do it all over again, I would never marry him. Because the marriage that should never have happened wasn’t my marriage to Uncle Bimo—it was my marriage to your father. Now look … he left you without a penny. Who do you think has supported you for twenty years? Me, Binar. Me, with Bimo by my side. Your father? A loser who should’ve died.”
Binar clenched her fists so tightly that her fingernails dug into her palms, creating a sharp sting.
But the one who needed help was Binar’s mind, which had suddenly lost all sense of direction. Her emotions surged beyond control, impossible to calm with a simple breath. Fear and anxiety over things that might never happen made it difficult for Binar to control herself.
“Mom, I never wanted Dad to cheat, either. I never wanted him to run away and leave us. I didn’t want you to keep falling apart because of him. And if you regret marrying Dad, does that mean you regret giving birth to me, too?”
Murni turned her face away to avoid eye contact with Binar. But Murni’s silence confirmed that it was all true.
Fall, hurt, rise. Binar was going through that cycle again. Over and over in a nauseating loop.
For God’s sake, Murni’s regret over her existence was the most painful thing in Binar’s world.
“Fine … but, Mom, I don’t regret ever entering your life or being part of it. I’m just disappointed that you changed. Why, Mom?”
Naura stepped forward and stood in front of Binar, shoving the girl’s shoulder. “Don’t corner Mom like that!”
Binar wasn’t about to stay quiet. She shoved Naura’s shoulder back even harder. “You’re an outsider. Stay out of this. You have to accept the fact that you and your sister destroyed a child’s life. Mine. And now I’ve truly lost. Are you happy now that you got everything you wanted?”
“Watch your mouth, Binar. We didn’t steal anyone from you. And if Mom loves Azalia and me more, then we have every right to that love. You also need to accept the fact that you’re a wound in Mom’s life … because you’re the daughter of the bastard who hurt her. So whenever Mom looks at you, she sees her own wound. Understand?” Naura spoke heatedly, putting extra emphasis on her final word.
Binar took a step back. It felt as if half the world had collapsed, and the ground beneath her was no longer steady.
Naura’s words were the truth Binar had spent all this time trying to deny. But once again, Murni said nothing, as if confirming Naura’s accusation.
“No, I’m not a wound. I’m not anyone’s wound. I’m Binar. I’m not a wound in Mom’s life. I’M NOT A WOUND!” Binar’s voice cracked as she screamed and shook her head violently, clamping both hands over her ears.
“I said I’m not a wound …”
Binar grabbed the chair from her vanity and threw it carelessly, making Murni, Naura, and Azalia stare at one another in shock. They hadn’t expected Binar’s reaction to be this extreme.
BANG.
Binar swept everything off her vanity, sending its contents scattering as if blown away by a storm. They crashed loudly onto the floor, which bore silent witness.
One of the lipstick boxes fell apart at Murni’s feet, its contents spilling across the floor in front of her and her two daughters.
They lowered their heads, looking utterly shocked. Before they could recover, another crash rang out. Binar threw all the books and the photo vase.
“Hey, Binar, don’t do this, okay? Don’t use some cheap tactic to get Mom’s attention.”
“I’m not a wound in anyone else’s life.”
“Okay … okay, you’re Binar. I was wrong to say that! Now calm down, okay?” Naura said, trying to soothe her.
But she didn’t dare approach Binar. All she could do was gesture from a safe distance for Binar to calm down.
Azalia was in the same position, hiding behind her mother. Murni, meanwhile, stood frozen, struggling to say anything. She was shocked and a little worried to see Binar behaving unlike the daughter she knew. But she didn’t want to embrace her. Maybe she felt guilty—or maybe Binar really was the source of her wound.
To be continued.