Chapter Ten: The Truths They Kept Hidden
Lin Wanqing barely slept all night.
Her phone lay on the nightstand.
The screen had gone dark long ago.
But Zhou Yuan'an's last message felt like a tiny thorn lodged in her heart.
—There was something back then I never told you.
She didn't know what that something was.
Yet, for no reason she could explain, she felt afraid.
Because judging from everything that had happened today, the past she thought she knew might not have been the whole story at all.
Gu Chengyuan had something he was hiding from her.
Zhou Yuan'an had something he was hiding from her too.
And she herself seemed to be standing at the very center of the story, only to discover at the end that everyone else understood her life better than she did.
The feeling struck Lin Wanqing as ridiculous.
And heartbreaking.
A little after two in the morning, she finally picked up her phone.
Zhou Yuan'an hadn't sent anything else.
The chat screen was still paused on that message.
Lin Wanqing stared at it for a long time.
Then, at last, she typed a few words.
—Let's meet tomorrow and talk.
She didn't wait for his reply.
After sending the message, she switched her phone straight to silent mode.
But when she lay back down, she still couldn't sleep.
The night outside was quiet.
Every now and then, a car passed by.
Faint, indistinct sounds drifted over from somewhere in the distance.
Lin Wanqing closed her eyes, but scenes from those years kept surfacing in her mind.
The first time she met Gu Chengyuan.
He had been standing at the back of the classroom, stopped by the teacher for being late.
Back then, Lin Wanqing had thought he was nothing but trouble.
Later, he sat down beside her.
After that, he started asking her to eat lunch with him every day.
When she forgot to bring a pen, he handed her his.
When she was upset, he sat with her on the athletic field.
When she had a fever, he ran out in the middle of the night to buy medicine.
They went from friends to lovers, and everything seemed to happen naturally.
Lin Wanqing had never imagined they would break up.
Much less that it would happen so suddenly.
That day, he asked to see her.
At the place they used to visit all the time.
Lin Wanqing had even thought he wanted to discuss where they should go that weekend.
But Gu Chengyuan sat across from her without saying a word for a long time.
Finally, he said only one thing.
“Lin Wanqing, let's break up.”
She froze.
She asked him why.
He didn't answer.
She asked if he didn't love her anymore.
He fell silent.
She asked if she had done something wrong.
He remained silent.
In the end, he only said,
“I'm sorry.”
That day, Lin Wanqing felt as if someone had pushed her off a very high place.
She didn't even know how she got home.
All she remembered was that her phone was filled with missed calls.
She hadn't answered any of them.
Gu Chengyuan never contacted her again after that.
At least, not in the world as she knew it.
Until now.
Lin Wanqing opened her eyes.
She suddenly sat up.
Her heart was pounding.
A thought flashed through her mind.
Had Gu Chengyuan really never tried to contact her?
Or…
Had someone made her believe he hadn't?
The next morning, Lin Wanqing took a half-day off.
She didn't go to work.
Nor did she tell anyone where she was going.
At ten in the morning, she arrived at the café Zhou Yuan'an had chosen.
The place was quiet.
Only a few customers occupied the seats by the window.
When Lin Wanqing walked in, Zhou Yuan'an was already there.
He looked as if he hadn't slept all night.
Dark circles showed his exhaustion plainly.
When he saw Lin Wanqing approach, he stood.
“You're here.”
Lin Wanqing didn't respond.
She simply sat down across from him.
“Talk.”
Zhou Yuan'an was silent for a moment.
“What do you want to drink?”
“I'm not here for coffee.”
His hand stopped.
“Okay.”
Lin Wanqing looked at him.
“Yesterday, you said there was something you never told me.”
“Tell me now.”
Zhou Yuan'an lowered his head.
After a long while, he finally spoke.
“Before Gu Chengyuan left back then, he did come to see me.”
Lin Wanqing's heart tightened.
“Why did he come to you?”
“Because he knew I liked you.”
The words left Lin Wanqing completely stunned.
She stared at Zhou Yuan'an.
“What?”
Zhou Yuan'an gave a bitter laugh.
“You didn't know?”
Lin Wanqing said nothing.
She truly hadn't known.
She had always thought Zhou Yuan'an was just a friend.
Even though he had stayed by her side afterward.
Even though he always appeared when she was at her lowest.
Lin Wanqing had never imagined that what he felt for her wasn't simply friendship.
“How did he know?”
“Because I told him.”
Lin Wanqing frowned.
Zhou Yuan'an spoke slowly. “By then, I'd already liked you for a long time.”
“But you were always with him.”
“So I never said anything.”
Lin Wanqing's fingers slowly curled into fists.
“And then?”
“Later, he came to me.”
“He asked me if, one day, he wasn't by your side, I would take care of you.”
Lin Wanqing's breath caught.
Zhou Yuan'an's voice was low.
“I asked him what was going on between you two.”
“He didn't say much.”
“He only told me he might have to leave for a while.”
Lin Wanqing looked at him.
“For a while?”
“Yes.”
“He didn't say you were breaking up?”
“No.”
Zhou Yuan'an lifted his head.
“At least not to me. He never said he planned to break up with you.”
Lin Wanqing's mind descended into chaos.
If Gu Chengyuan had only planned to leave for a while, then why had he broken up with her in the end?
Zhou Yuan'an continued.
“I asked him why he didn't just tell you directly.”
“He said he didn't want you to bear it with him.”
Lin Wanqing gave a bitter smile.
That line again.
She'd heard enough of it.
“And then?”
“And then…”
Zhou Yuan'an stopped.
His expression grew even more complicated.
Lin Wanqing watched him.
“Keep going.”
“I agreed.”
“Agreed to what?”
“I agreed to take care of you while he was gone.”
Lin Wanqing froze.
In that instant, she suddenly remembered that period.
After Gu Chengyuan left, Zhou Yuan'an had been by her side practically every day.
When she cried, he stayed with her.
When she got drunk, he took her home.
When she refused to eat, he bought food and left it outside her door.
At the time, she had always thought it was because Zhou Yuan'an was her best friend.
But now…
Everything suddenly had another explanation.
“You promised him.”
Lin Wanqing murmured.
“Yeah.”
“So you knew he hadn't abandoned me.”
“I knew.”
“But you didn't tell me anything.”
Zhou Yuan'an didn't deny it.
Lin Wanqing's heart slowly turned cold.
“Why?”
“Because I love you.”
Lin Wanqing closed her eyes.
The answer was more cruel than she had imagined.
“So you wanted us to break up?”
Zhou Yuan'an fell silent.
“Answer me.”
“Yes.”
This time, he didn't evade the question.
Yet Lin Wanqing felt as if her chest had been crushed beneath a tremendous weight.
“You knew how much I was suffering.”
“I knew.”
“You knew I waited for him every day.”
“I knew.”
“You knew I wanted to find him.”
“I knew.”
“And you still didn't tell me anything.”
Zhou Yuan'an's eyes reddened slightly.
“Lin Wanqing, I know I was selfish.”
“Back then, I really thought that if enough time passed, you'd forget him.”
“I thought I could stay by your side.”
“I thought that one day, you'd see me.”
Lin Wanqing looked at him.
But she felt no warmth at all.
Only disappointment.
“Do you know something?” she said softly.
“You weren't staying by my side.”
Zhou Yuan'an froze.
“You were waiting until I was at my most vulnerable, then making me believe you were the only one left.”
His face went white.
Lin Wanqing drew in a breath.
“Maybe you really do love me.”
“But your love scares me.”
“Because you knew the truth.”
“And you chose to let me keep misunderstanding everything.”
Zhou Yuan'an lowered his head.
“I'm sorry.”
Lin Wanqing gave a small laugh.
“Is that all any of you know how to say?”
Zhou Yuan'an didn't answer.
“But I don't want to hear it now.”
She looked at him.
“I want to know everything.”
Zhou Yuan'an was silent.
“What exactly did Gu Chengyuan tell you back then?”
“He said he might need to leave for a long time.”
“How long?”
“I don't know.”
“Where did he go?”
“He didn't say.”
“Then how did you find out something had happened to his family?”
Zhou Yuan'an looked at her.
“Because I went to find him.”
Lin Wanqing stared.
“You found him?”
“Yeah.”
“When?”
“A week after you broke up.”
Lin Wanqing's heartbeat quickened.
“Why?”
Zhou Yuan'an didn't answer immediately.
“Because I wanted to know whether he was really going to leave.”
Lin Wanqing watched him.
“You found him, and then?”
“I saw him coming out of a hospital.”
“A hospital?”
“Yeah.”
“His dad was still hospitalized then.”
Lin Wanqing's fingers began to tremble.
She suddenly remembered what she had been doing at the time.
She had been crying at home.
Calling Gu Chengyuan's number again and again.
And him?
He had been in the hospital.
She had never known.
Zhou Yuan'an continued.
“I asked him why he hadn't told you.”
“He said he didn't want you to worry.”
“I asked him what you were supposed to do.”
“He said…”
Zhou Yuan'an stopped.
Lin Wanqing stared at him.
“What did he say?”
Zhou Yuan'an closed his eyes briefly.
“He asked me to take care of you.”
Lin Wanqing's tears spilled instantly.
She suddenly found it deeply ironic.
Gu Chengyuan had entrusted her to Zhou Yuan'an.
And Zhou Yuan'an had taken advantage of that trust.
“He trusted you,” she said.
Zhou Yuan'an didn't raise his head.
“Yeah.”
“But you…”
“I know.”
“Did you do something else too?”
Zhou Yuan'an's expression stiffened.
Lin Wanqing's heart sank.
“Yes,” he finally said.
Lin Wanqing suddenly forgot how to breathe.
“What?”
Zhou Yuan'an took his phone from his pocket.
He placed it on the table.
“Do you remember switching phones a long time ago?”
Lin Wanqing frowned.
“I remember.”
“It was not long after you two broke up.”
“Yeah.”
“You took that phone in for repairs afterward.”
Lin Wanqing looked at him.
A terrible premonition rose in her heart.
“What about it?”
Zhou Yuan'an's hand slowly tightened.
“The repair technician was a friend of mine.”
Lin Wanqing said nothing.
“Your phone had water damage.”
“A lot of the data hadn't been backed up.”
“I told you the contents couldn't be recovered.”
Lin Wanqing's breath stopped.
“But…”
Zhou Yuan'an's voice dropped lower and lower.
“Actually, some of the data could be recovered.”
Lin Wanqing went rigid.
“What data?”
He raised his head.
“Messages.”
The world seemed to go silent in an instant.
Lin Wanqing stared at him.
For a long time, she didn't react.
“Whose messages?”
She already knew the answer.
Yet she still asked.
Zhou Yuan'an closed his eyes.
“Gu Chengyuan's.”
Lin Wanqing's hands went ice-cold.
“What did you say?”
“He sent you messages afterward.”
Her tears fell immediately.
“That's impossible.”
“It's true.”
“Impossible.”
She shook her head.
“I checked my phone every day.”
“I waited every day.”
“If he had contacted me, how could I not have known?”
Zhou Yuan'an said nothing.
Lin Wanqing studied his expression.
The last shred of hope in her heart slowly disappeared.
“You deleted the messages?”
Zhou Yuan'an's silence was the answer.
Lin Wanqing's tears finally broke free.
“You deleted his messages.”
“I'm sorry.”
“You deleted his messages!”
Her voice rose.
People nearby couldn't help looking over.
But Lin Wanqing didn't care anymore.
She only felt cold all over.
All those years.
She had always thought Gu Chengyuan had never looked back.
Always thought he had left without a second thought.
Always thought she was the only one still trapped in the past.
But now someone was telling her the truth.
He had tried to find her.
He had sent her messages.
He hadn't failed to try to come back.
She simply had never seen them.
“How many?” she asked, trembling.
Zhou Yuan'an didn't answer.
“I asked you, how many?”
“A lot.”
Lin Wanqing's tears kept falling.
“What does ‘a lot’ mean?”
“At first, he sent messages every day.”
Lin Wanqing's breathing fell completely out of rhythm.
“Every day?”
“Yeah.”
“How long did he send them?”
Zhou Yuan'an was silent.
“Over a month.”
Lin Wanqing froze.
Over a month.
She sat where she was.
Suddenly, she felt as if she couldn't understand the language of this world.
Over a month.
That had been the most painful month of her life.
Every day, the first thing she did after waking up was check her phone.
Every night, when she couldn't sleep, she checked it again.
Again and again, she told herself:
If Gu Chengyuan still loved her, he would definitely contact her.
But her phone had remained silent.
So, little by little, she had come to believe he truly didn't want her anymore.
But now…
Zhou Yuan'an was telling her that wasn't the truth.
“Why?”
Lin Wanqing looked at him.
“Why did you take it this far?”
Zhou Yuan'an's eyes were red.
“I was afraid.”
“Afraid of what?”
“Afraid you'd find out he was still trying to reach you.”
“Afraid you'd go back to him.”
Lin Wanqing smiled.
Tears continued streaming down her face.
“So you destroyed my right to choose.”
Zhou Yuan'an stared at her.
“You weren't afraid I'd go back to him.”
“You were afraid that once I knew the truth, I wouldn't choose you.”
“I…”
“You made me believe he didn't love me.”
Lin Wanqing's voice trembled.
“You made me hate him for all those years.”
“Do you know how many times I told myself I had to let go?”
“Do you know how many times I thought that if he had only been willing to turn back once, I might have forgiven him?”
Zhou Yuan'an closed his eyes.
“I'm sorry.”
Lin Wanqing stood.
“Stop saying that.”
“Lin Wanqing.”
“I don't want to hear your apology anymore.”
She picked up her bag.
Then turned to leave.
Zhou Yuan'an suddenly called after her.
“Wait.”
Lin Wanqing stopped.
But she didn't turn around.
“There is one more thing.”
Her body went slightly rigid.
“What?”
Zhou Yuan'an's voice was low.
“I didn't delete his final message.”
Lin Wanqing slowly turned her head.
“What?”
“I still have that old phone.”
Her expression changed instantly.
“You kept it?”
Zhou Yuan'an didn't deny it.
“Why?”
“I don't know.”
“Maybe because… I never had the nerve to destroy it for real.”
Lin Wanqing looked at him.
“Where is the phone?”
Zhou Yuan'an was silent.
“I asked you where it is.”
“At my place.”
Lin Wanqing picked up her bag.
“Take me there.”
Zhou Yuan'an was stunned.
“Now?”
“Now.”
Neither of them spoke during the drive.
Lin Wanqing sat in the passenger seat.
The streets outside slipped steadily backward.
Yet her heart beat faster and faster.
She didn't know what she was about to see.
Nor did she know what Gu Chengyuan had actually sent.
She was even afraid.
Afraid the messages wouldn't say what she imagined.
Afraid that learning the truth would only hurt more.
But she had to know.
She had been kept in the dark for far too long.
Zhou Yuan'an lived not far from the café.
After they entered, he said nothing more.
He went straight to the study.
A few minutes later, he came out carrying a small box.
Lin Wanqing stood in the middle of the living room.
She looked at the box.
Her heart felt ready to leap out of her chest.
Zhou Yuan'an slowly opened it.
Inside was an old phone.
Lin Wanqing recognized it.
It was her old phone.
She had used it for two years.
There was even a small scratch in the corner of the screen.
She had left it there after accidentally dropping it once.
She reached out.
Her fingertips trembled.
“Give it to me.”
Zhou Yuan'an didn't hand it over immediately.
“Lin Wanqing.”
She looked up.
“What?”
“If you look, you might be even more hurt.”
Lin Wanqing suddenly found that laughable.
“You're worried about hurting me now?”
Zhou Yuan'an's hand slowly loosened.
Lin Wanqing snatched the phone from him.
The battery had long since died.
Zhou Yuan'an brought over a charging cable.
The few minutes it took to turn on felt like a century to Lin Wanqing.
Finally, the screen lit up.
Her familiar wallpaper appeared.
It was a photo she and Gu Chengyuan had taken together.
The two people in it were both smiling happily.
Lin Wanqing stared at the picture.
More tears slipped down her cheeks.
Zhou Yuan'an stood beside her.
“The messages are on it.”
Lin Wanqing ignored him.
She opened the messaging app.
Her finger scrolled down, one message at a time.
Finally.
She saw the name.
Gu Chengyuan.
The chat history stopped many years ago.
Lin Wanqing's finger paused.
The last message was the one she had sent him back then.
—Do you really not love me anymore?
There was no reply afterward.
At least, not on this screen.
She frowned.
Beside her, Zhou Yuan'an spoke in a low voice.
“Scroll up.”
Lin Wanqing looked up.
“What?”
“Those messages… they're in the backup.”
Her heart sank again.
Zhou Yuan'an helped her open a folder.
Inside was a recovered record.
Lin Wanqing stared at the screen.
Gu Chengyuan's name appeared again.
She tapped it open.
The first line came into view.
—Lin Wanqing, I'm sorry. I know you must hate me right now.
Her tears fell instantly.
The second line:
—But it's really not because I don't love you.
Lin Wanqing's hands began to tremble.
She read on, one word at a time.
—A lot has happened with my family, and I don't know how to tell you.
—I don't want you to worry with me.
—Once I get everything taken care of, I'll come back for you. I promise.
—You don't have to forgive me.
—But don't think it's because you weren't good enough.
Lin Wanqing's tears fell onto the screen.
She could barely make out the words.
So it was true.
He really had said those things.
He really had wanted to tell her.
The words she had wanted most to hear.
They had existed all those years ago.
She simply hadn't seen them.
She kept scrolling.
One message after another.
Sometimes one a day.
Sometimes several in a single day.
—My dad is more stable today.
—I remembered what you said, about taking you on a trip after I graduated.
—Lin Wanqing, I miss you so much.
—I know I don't have the right to say that.
—But I really do miss you.
Lin Wanqing finally couldn't hold herself up and sank to the floor.
She hugged the phone to her chest, sobbing so hard she could barely breathe.
Zhou Yuan'an stood some distance away.
He didn't approach.
He didn't say another word.
Because he knew that some things couldn't be repaired with a single apology.
Lin Wanqing didn't know how long she cried.
Only after her tears finally began to slow did she open the screen again.
The messages ended with the final one.
It was dated the forty-third day after they broke up.
Gu Chengyuan:
—Lin Wanqing, I finally managed to get things under control for now.
—I'll come see you tomorrow.
—If you're still willing to see me.
Lin Wanqing's breath suddenly stopped.
She stared at the words.
I'll come see you tomorrow.
But that tomorrow…
He hadn't shown up.
At least, not in her memory.
Lin Wanqing slowly raised her head.
She looked at Zhou Yuan'an.
“What happened after that?”
Zhou Yuan'an didn't answer.
“I asked you.”
Her voice turned cold.
“Why didn't he come?”
Zhou Yuan'an's face slowly went pale.
Lin Wanqing suddenly understood.
“You know.”
Zhou Yuan'an closed his eyes.
“I know.”
“What did you do?”
The room fell terrifyingly silent.
After a long time, Zhou Yuan'an finally spoke.
“That night, he came to see me.”
Lin Wanqing's fingers clenched hard.
“He asked how you'd been doing lately.”
“I told him you were devastated.”
“He asked if you'd mentioned him.”
“I said…”
Zhou Yuan'an stopped.
Lin Wanqing's heart sank to the bottom.
“What did you say?”
He raised his head, pain filling his eyes.
“I said you didn't want to see him anymore.”
Lin Wanqing went completely still.
“What?”
“I told him you'd said that even if he came back, you wouldn't forgive him.”
Lin Wanqing stared at him.
Her tears suddenly stopped.
She only felt ice-cold all over.
“I never said that.”
“I know.”
“I never said that.”
“I know.”
“Then why?”
Zhou Yuan'an's voice finally began to shake.
“Because I was afraid he really would come back.”
Lin Wanqing stood.
Step by step, she walked up to him.
“So you lied to him.”
Zhou Yuan'an didn't deny it.
“You lied to me, and you lied to him.”
“You made me think he didn't want me.”
“And you made him think I didn't want him.”
Zhou Yuan'an lowered his head.
Lin Wanqing suddenly laughed.
The smile only made her look more heartbroken.
“So that's how it was.”
She finally understood.
They hadn't failed to look for each other.
They hadn't stopped loving each other.
During those forty-three days, Gu Chengyuan had wanted to come back.
And she had been waiting all along.
But someone had stood between them.
Said words neither of them had ever said.
Made decisions neither of them had ever made.
Then convinced two people who had wanted to draw closer that the other had already turned away.
“Zhou Yuan'an.”
Lin Wanqing looked at him.
“What you destroyed wasn't just our relationship.”
Zhou Yuan'an's tears finally fell.
“I know.”
“You destroyed the life we could have had.”
Lin Wanqing's voice was soft.
Yet it was more brutal than any accusation.
She turned and walked away.
This time, Zhou Yuan'an didn't stop her.
The moment the door closed, Lin Wanqing could no longer hold herself up and leaned against the wall.
She looked down at the phone.
She held the old phone tightly in her hand.
Inside it were forty-three days.
For forty-three days, Gu Chengyuan hadn't forgotten her.
He hadn't given up on her.
He hadn't left as decisively as she had believed.
And what about her?
She hadn't truly let go either.
They had simply been separated by a lie.
Separated for all those years.
Lin Wanqing slowly crouched down.
Tears fell again.
She didn't know what she was supposed to do now.
Should she go find Gu Chengyuan immediately?
Should she tell him she knew the truth?
Should she demand to know why he hadn't come to find her directly back then?
But then she remembered.
Gu Chengyuan hadn't said anything today.
He had only agreed not to contact her for the next few days.
So he really hadn't appeared.
He was waiting.
Waiting for her, just as he had said.
Lin Wanqing raised her head.
The sky outside was bright.
Yet she suddenly remembered herself many years ago, staring at her phone and waiting.
If she had seen those messages back then, would their lives have turned out completely differently?
She didn't know.
Life had no what-ifs.
The time they had lost could never be recovered.
But at least now, she finally knew.
The Gu Chengyuan of all those years ago hadn't failed to turn back.
Someone had made him believe she was unwilling to turn back.
And Lin Wanqing finally understood.
Some people arrive late not because they don't want to come.
But because someone secretly closed the door they could have walked through.
Lin Wanqing tightened her grip on the phone.
Then she stood.
For the first time, she felt she no longer wanted to run from this.
She hadn't completely forgiven Gu Chengyuan.
Nor could she pretend the hurt had never happened.
But there was one thing she had to tell him herself.
All those years, she hadn't been unwilling to wait.
She had simply believed he had never come back.
Lin Wanqing took out her own phone.
She opened her chat with Gu Chengyuan.
Her finger hovered over the keyboard for a long time.
In the end, she sent only one sentence.
—Gu Chengyuan, where are you right now?
After the message was sent, her heart began to race.
Within seconds, her phone buzzed.
—At the office.
—What's wrong?
Lin Wanqing stared at the two messages.
Her eyes grew hot again.
Slowly, she typed the next line.
—I want to see you.
This time, Gu Chengyuan didn't ask why.
He didn't ask what had happened.
Nor did he make her wait.
His reply contained only three words.
—I'll come to you.
Lin Wanqing stared at the screen.
She suddenly wanted to cry, then suddenly wanted to laugh.
She stood in the sunlight, clutching the old phone that had preserved the truth for all those years.
In the distance, people continued to come and go.
No one knew that on this ordinary morning, a love that had been misunderstood for years had finally recovered the evidence it had lost.
But Lin Wanqing also understood that recovering the truth didn't mean every wound would heal at once.
There were still too many things left unsaid between her and Gu Chengyuan.
Too much hurt they had yet to truly face.
Too much lost that could never be theirs again.
Only this time, at least, they no longer had to guess.
They no longer had to let someone else's words decide what they felt for each other.
Because some late-arriving love doesn't truly need a perfect second chance.
It needs a truth finally spoken aloud.
A gentle breeze passed by.
Lin Wanqing lifted her head.
She knew Gu Chengyuan was coming toward her.
And this time, she didn't want to stay where she was, pretending she didn't care.
She didn't want to let anyone else decide for her anymore.
She wanted to tell him herself.
All those years, she had been waiting.
She simply hadn't known that he, too, had once tried again and again to return to her side.
And now, the man who had arrived years too late was finally no longer separated from her by misunderstanding.
He was walking toward her again.
Only neither of them knew that when they truly faced each other, would all the longing suppressed for years first turn into tears, or would it finally make them understand—
The greatest regret had never been missing each other.
It was that they had once been so close, yet because of a single lie, they had missed each other for so many years.
And now, the truth had finally returned.
From here on, it was time for them to decide for themselves.
Whether this love, delayed for far too long, still had a chance to lead them back to the future that had once belonged to them both.